Part 2! Out of 3 for some reason! Today, our responsibility is to stay awake through rings somehow (not apologizing) and then try to maintain a respectable amount of life skills during the fall terror of the beam final and the leg-explosion terror of the men’s vault final. Three really challenging tasks. We can earn medals with our performances today.
Starting order
Rings – You, Petrounias, Goossens, Abliazin, Liu, Pinheiro Rodrigues, Radivilov, Zanetti
Vault – Nagornyy, Radivilov, Shirai, Dragulescu, Ri, Gonzalez, Verniaiev, Abliazin
Beam – Fan, Onyshko, Biles, Wevers, Ponor, Hernandez, Boyer, Saraiva
Why exactly have we changed the event order to put the two men’s events back-to-back? That sounds fun for Radivilov. But does it make sense? It doesn’t? Great.
Rings final
Ugggggggghhhh.
We’ll get through it together.
“There was also a withdrawal.” That’s all you’re going to say about Van Gelder?
The difference with making Abliazin and Radivilov going back-to-back events versus a team competition is that they don’t get a touch for EF.
You – Opens with a strongily-boo – hangs out for a while at the mall – bicep rips open and a potato falls out – clangity-flop in a layout position – chest down lunge on layout double double. 15.400
Petrounias – deltoid transforms into watermelon – smashes a skyscraper while laughing at it – smiles while eating jar of nails – floats directly into the sky on the back of Zeus – sticks double double. 16.000
Goossens – not even level like a loser – opens with popped cranial artery – directly connects double back to red skin to purple skin for .3 CV – too Belgian for this – DLO 1/1 dismount. 14.933.
“Courtney, it’s not an event you compete on.” WHAT???
Jon just agreed with me that rings workers are muscly little potatoes.
Abliazin – Accidentally crushes his own head with his giant arms while waiting to begin his routine and has to withdraw because of not having a head. Real shame there as he could have medaled in this final. Finds new head to compete dismount, layout double double step. 15.700 into second.
Liu – pulls your face off with his fingers – tries to open a pickle jar and accidentally destroys the universe – spleen does come out through his lips, accidentally, which will be a deduction if the judges saw it. Lunge back. 15.600.
Pinheiro-Rodrigues – falls asleep in mid-air – uses the sun as a bed – decided mid-routine that he actually wants to pursue a career in the fine arts – retires from gymnastics in order to create more beauty in the world. DLO 1/1 step. 15.233.
Courtney’s like, “I’ve got nothing.” Courtney and I get each other.
Radivilov – flexes so hard he spontaneously sprouts a second neck tattoo, this one dedicated to Oleg – sheds a single tear for the environment – his back explodes into a series of roman candles – sticks double double. 15.466. In behind Liu.
Zanetti – sheds off potato costume to become a real boy – eats caribou skull – spontaneously fires bullet out of own shoulder – eyes pop out and shoot across the arena killing a spectator. Hop back on dismount. 15.766. Into second.
Gold: Petrounias
Silver: Zanetti
Bronze: Abliazin
Potato hugs! Mad potato respect!
Men’s vault final
Let’s just hope everyone stays a person.
Nagornyy 1 – Dragulescu, larger bound back, good chest position on landing 15.233.
Nagornyy 2 – Kas 2/1, very strong landing, small hop, also chest up. Two safe vaults!
15.316 average for Nagornyy.
Radivilov 1 – NO WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO US PLEASE STOP – he actually almost did it – he basically Karmakared it – but did he land feet first? Do we think it’s a zero? To my eye, that was not feet-first.
14.933. Gets a score for it.
Tsuk double pike second vault with a large lunge back. LOL, almost fell on the Tsuk double pike. I love that it was almost worse than the triple front. Not really, but you know.
Kenzo – EXCELLENT 3.5 Yurchenko – so much better than we’ve seen in training – pretty much all the way around with a Shawn Johnson step – crossed legs, just a tad under but will get credit. 15.833.
Kenzo 2 – easy peasy Kas 1.5 with a step – 15.066 for that.
Kenzo still into first with 15.449 average.
Dragulescu – Dragulescu – step back, pretty big step, great execution, chest up, comfortable landing. 15.266.
Dragulescu 2 – ro half on 2.5. Very strong, small hop, but his average will be the same as Kenzo!
FINISHES WITH AIRPLANE ARM SPIN!
Kenzo remains in first over Dragulescu with tiebreak! Higher single vault score is the tiebreak.
Ri – Piked Dragulescu – excellent height, larger lunge back, completely loses piked form in the air into a straddle tucked, but successfully didn’t look like he was going to die. 15.616.
Ri 2 – Tsuk double back full and nearly stuck it – what a preposterous human – obviously into first. Steel-reinforced angles –
Gonzalez does a Tsuk double pike and everyone’s like, that’s cute.
Gonzalez 2 – Shewfelt with a lunge forward. Just OK. Won’t challenge for medals.
Verniaiev – NEARLY sticks Dragulescu – just the smallest quiver with one of his feet – very strong. 15.400.
Verniaiev 2 – Kas 2/1, large hop back. 15.233 for that one.
Oleg will be level with Nagornyy, and actually level by all the tiebreaks because they received identical execution for identical difficulty. So they’ll stay tied, though it won’t matter because they’re fourth.
Abliazin – Tsuk full in, large step forward, a little lower landing than Ri. 15.600. Too close to Ri?
Abliazin 2 – half on 2.5 – chest down landing and a few larger steps back. 15.516. Gets some Paseka E scoring on those vaults, but also vault scoring.
That means Abliazin is into 2nd behind Ri.
It’s Shirai in third, Dragulescu down to 4th on the tiebreak.
I’m sure there will be anger for that but LONG LIVE TIEBREAKS! The point of an event final is to separate the best gymnasts. Ties are not separating the best gymnasts.
Still a real shame for Dragulescu not to medal though. I think he has a very good argument that he should have been ahead of Kenzo outright.
And we still have to do beam!
Beam final
Oh dear. Dear dear dear. Here we go.
Flavia Saraiva is actually half the height of the other competitors.
Fan – Very un-Chinese leo. Trying to trick the judges into thinking she’s Dutch. Opening check on her layout series – clean walkover, otherwise calm and pretty – larger bend at the hips on that side somi – just a few too many checks here – 3/1 with a lunge back. 14.500. 6.3/8.2
Oh yes. Beam judging. I forgot that this thing is going to take forever.
Onyshko – layout series is good, small check but smaller than Fan – good side aerial – large pause before tuck full series and then a fall on it, no chance to save – check on switch ring – double back with step. 13.400.
Sea-Money – 2.5 wolf solid this time – good leap connections – barani YES, one of her best baranis, that was for me I think – very secure loso loso series – NOOOOOOOO, huge break on punch front, grasps the beam. No point to continue living – check on walkover – hop back on dismount.
It. Just. Got. Interesting.
LOL. Still into first for the moment with 14.733. Oh, Simone.
Wevers – round off bhs mount – closeup of her face during her double L because no one knows anything – two side aerials combo – a couple tiny checks – insane triple turn – single L to full turn to double spin – switch to bhs full – gainer “layout” full with a hop.
Sanne doing her own D score is my favorite thing in the world. Stars they’re just like us.
“BUT WHAT’S A SPIN,” say the judges.
15.466 for Sanne! There is justice in the world!
Ponor. Oh Cata, what is this leo? Cirque de Dominatrix?
Ponor – two-part switch ring – onodi and breaks combo out of it with wobbles – front aerial to bhs layout – large break on switch 1/2 with leg up – bhs 1/1 – too many wobbles here, also struggled to get her leg to split on bhs 3/4 – double pike large bounce back. Just a 14.000 for Ponor. 5.8 D, 8.2 E.
Aimee is on “mood boost” duty overdrive.
Hernandez – front pike is solid – aerial to sissone to split – two loso series, whips her arms back to avoid a wobble – full turn is not her best skill – good sheep – high front tuck to wolf – side aerial – switch to a tight switch 1/2 with a small check – solid switch ring – double pike just small hop. Good one. Into second. 15.333.
Hernandez had the higher execution, but Wevers got her on difficulty.
Boyer – round of layout, so floaty and wonderful – switch to switch 1/2, switch half is not 180 with a check – some bent knees in the walkover and other skills – bend at the waist on aerial – small check on side somi – double pike with small step and NCAA salute.
US submitting inquiry for Laurie’s beam. Are they hoping she’s getting a magical 6.6 to pass Wevers now?
14.600 for Boyer, into 4th.
Saraiva – two loso series, small slide back – large break on layout two feet – does well not to grasp the beam but a huge wobble, bend at the waist and steps – large pause before switch ring, very pretty – small check on sheep – hop back on tuck full – aerial to aerial to side somi – bend at the waist again – double pike. Too many errors in there.
SANNNNNNNEEEE!
Long wait on the score because obviously. Also apparently an inquiry for Boyer.
Let’s make sure this takes forever, please and thank you.
14.533 for Saraiva. Into 5th. Too many wobbles.
Tears or eye glitter? No one can ever tell.
Scores still not official because of the Boyer inquiry for bronze.
Is this a final now? I’m going to assume it’s a final.
Gold: Weversssssssss
Silver: Hernandez
Bronze: Biles
LOL at Simone grabbing the beam and still getting bronze. Simone things.
Note: Give Simone her 6.7 D from qualification and .5 back for grabbing the beam, and she’s still behind Wevers. Not saying Simone wouldn’t have won with a hit, but it wouldn’t have exactly been a foregone conclusion.
There’s only one more day left. Try not to think about it.