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Things Are Happening – January 26, 2017

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A. Weekend schedule

Friday, January 27
Scores Watch
6:30 ET/3:30 PT – North Carolina @ Pitt LINK ACCN
6:30 ET/3:30 PT – Bridgeport @ Brown
7:00 ET/4:00 PT – [16] Auburn @ [3] Florida LINK SEC
7:00 ET/4:00 PT – [2] LSU @ [6] Kentucky LINK SEC+
7:00 ET/4:00 PT – [11] Missouri @ [12] Georgia LINK SEC+
7:00 ET/4:00 PT – [9] Southern Utah @ [24] NC State LINK ACCN
7:00 ET/4:00 PT – UW-Oshkosh @ Centenary LINK CTVT
7:30 ET/4:30 PT – [1] Oklahoma @ Iowa State LINK ISU
8:30 ET/5:30 PT – [5] Alabama @ [23] Arkansas LINK SEC
9:00 ET/6:00 PT – [14] Boise State v. BYU
10:00 ET/7:00 PT – Hamline @ Seattle Pacific FREE
Saturday, January 28
Scores Watch
1:00 ET/10:00 PT – Penn @ West Chester
1:00 ET/10:00 PT – Springfield @ Brockport FREE
4:00 ET/1:00 PT – [12] Nebraska @ [10] Michigan LINK FREE
4:00 ET/1:00 PT – Bridgeport, Southern Connecticut, Rhode Island @ Yale Ivy
4:30 ET/1:30 PT – [4] Utah @ [19] Washington P12
4:30 ET/1:30 PT – [8] UCLA @ [17] Oregon State LINK P12
5:00 ET/2:00 PT – [20] Ohio State @ Minnesota LINK BTN+
5:00 ET/2:00 PT – UW-La Crosse, Winona State @ Lindenwood LINK FREE
5:00 ET/2:00 PT – UW-Eau Claire @ UW-Whitewater LINK FREE
7:00 ET/4:00 PT – Michigan State, Cornell, Ursinus @ Rutgers LINK
7:45 ET/4:45 PT – Metroplex Challenge ([18] George Washington, Central Michigan, Bowling Green, San Jose State) FLOG
9:00 ET/6:00 PT – Arizona State @ [15] Cal LINK P12
Sunday, January 29
Scores Watch
1:00 ET/10:00 PT – [6] Kentucky @ Ball State FREE
1:00 ET/10:00 PT – Eastern Michigan @ Western Michigan ESPN3
1:00 ET/10:00 PT – Utah State @ New Hampshire
2:00 ET/11:00 PT – [7] Denver, Towson, Temple @ [25] West Virginia LINK FREE
2:00 ET/11:00 PT – Kent State, SEMO @ Northern Illinois NIU
2:00 ET/11:00 PT – Iowa State @ TWU LINK FREE
3:00 ET/12:00 PT – Penn State @ [21] Illinois FREE
3:00 ET/12:00 PT – Maryland @ [22] Iowa Iowa
3:00 ET/12:00 PT – Air Force @ Centenary
4:00 ET/1:00 PT – Arizona @ Stanford LINK P12
4:00 ET/1:00 PT – Sacramento State @ UC Davis LINK FREE
5:00 ET/2:00 PT – [5] Alabama v. [16] Auburn (@ Birmingham, AL) LINK
7:00 ET/4:00 PT – Illinois-Chicago @ Illinois State FREE

B. The weekend of horrendous scheduling

Thanks, NCAA gymnastics. Your everything is terrible.

Friday begins with five simultaneous meets involving significant teams. Oh, just the five. I’m sort of glad Oklahoma’s meet is behind a paywall since it takes one of the options off the table that we don’t have to bother pretending to pay attention to. So then it’s just the three SEC meets and Southern Utah, suddenly a top-10 team. Easy. We won’t succumb to hysterical hallucinations at all. 

The SEC Network took Auburn/Florida and Alabama/Arkansas for its TV meets because, before the season started, you’d pick those as the best of the SEC meets of the day. But now, LSU/Kentucky and Missouri/Georgia look far more consequential and compelling, so get out all your pairs of eyes. You’ll need them.

Saturday is just as bad, with the best Big Ten meet of the year in Nebraska/Michigan running simultaneously with Utah/Washington and UCLA/Oregon State. Great. Hooray for a divided audience!


C. Meet notes

D. American Cup catastrophe

The gleam of the original American Cup roster has officially left the honeymoon phase and entered the inevitable acrimonious divorce  and prescription-drug phase. Thorsdottir is out and will be replaced by Titarsolej, so basically cancel your entire life and return to the cave. And now, an ankle injury has rendered Ellie Black a maybe. Don’t be that surprised in a month’s time when a mason jar full of uncooked barley and a domesticated goose are introduced next to Ragan Smith.

E. GymCastic

This week, our dear Ruby Harrold told Jessica all about her history with exciting bars skills, how she ended up going to LSU, and how mature and diplomatic she can be when talking about the culture shock of moving to Jesustown USA. She handled that topic really professionally.

Amy Smith, the associate head coach at UNC, also talked about their BeTrue meet from last weekend, how the team responded, how damn well it went, and what a gem she is.

F. Dan Keatings

Dan’s hairline officially announced its retirement this week, though it had been transitioning toward retirement for a while now, taking on a commentary role with Her Tweddleship in the last couple years. Dan won the 2009 AA silver, but once he stopped ranking as a top AAer for GB, he found it difficult to make squads because his most useful piece is horse yet his routine doesn’t score as well as Whitlock’s or Smith’s. In any other country, he would have made more teams.

G. Week 3 routine poll

As of writing, Nicole Artz leads MyKayla Skinner by 23 votes. Feel free to continue taking this way too seriously. It’s very entertaining.

H. Beam routine of the week

Ashley Kelly came up this week because her 2006 AA score of 39.875 previously stood as the last time a gymnast reached that total before Maggie Nichols did so on Saturday. (As was correctly pointed out, Kupets did score 39.900 in her farewell Super Six in 2009, which always goes unrecorded because individual titles aren’t awarded for Super Six.) This is one of Kelly’s three career beam 10s, bestowed during the scoring wild west that was 2004.

 

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