Rachel Gowey enjoyed beating LSU
Trinity Thomas 10ed so hard she broke Jeremy Miranda
Derrian Gobourne fell, but made it fashion
Ruby Harrold did her best-ever vault and bars in the same meet
Lexy Ramler made a perfect with her bare hands again
Sabrina Vega affirmed she WILL kick your balls off
Josh Overton submitted his tape for So You Think You Can Dance
Cristal Isa announced that candle mounts are over
Cairo Leonard-Baker got 9.825 for this
Then she changed her name to Soonerio Bruin-Floridason and got 9.925
I tried to get Carol’s attention to talk about leaps
But then found a better way to get through the NCAA season
Dana blessed the judges and is praying for them
Nia Dennis’s salute was mostly spinning
Alexis Vasquez posited that standing was harder than aerials
And Kyla was like, “I feel you, girl”
Then Talitha Jones was like, “PISH TOSH THIS IS HOW ONE WOBBLES”
And Sinbad and Snoop welcomed you to Metroplex for some reason????
