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After much fanfare, a revolutionary new outfit for men’s gymnastics was unveiled
Make it law
The 2025 US Men’s Nationals Collection
Zoey said bring back low bar dismounts
Hard to learn!
And the Anastasia Webb Award for going OOB on choreography…
Over in NCAA, one judge gave Boozer 9.550 with a fall
Just…immediate jail
Cottbus was a little
So in the interest of athlete safety, this is just vault now
Also this is floor now
I’m sorry
Your new floor music is just thigh slaps
The correct reaction to victory: disgust
I repeat: utter disgust
High fives are too hard, just hug
Faith, summarize NCAA gymnastics
And I’m done. That’s all I needed.
Sure

