This year’s selection show was like
And it was an hour long
All the qualified teams gathered in front of phones to dance about their names being said
And act like we didn’t already know where all the teams were going based on a predetermined formula and geographical rules
Except Oklahoma was all
If you missed it, there was generally a lot of this
And I could have used more this
Where was the segment where Clemson tells us what they really think of their play-in demotion?
Where was the segment where Cal tells us what they think of going to Alabama?
In the end, 28 teams made the regional semifinals
Another 8 were dropped into the play-ins
And all the other teams have been disappeared until next season
Over at the conference championships, four judges per event meant it was harder to get 10s
“No no, TWO 10s, that’s all I said you could give out!”
Chloe wrote the answer key on the top of her feet
We watched with bated breath to see if Davis’s last routine would be enough to pass a 195.835 NQS
Balance checks were for standing on the floor
Georgia got a 0.2 team deduction
Stanford called upon nature
And it won them the ACC Championship
And who has a belly buttonnnnnn? You do!
