The Balance Beam Situation

Because gymnastics is a comedy, not a drama

Things Are Happening – June 18, 2020

A. Simone’s triple double: beam edition

With the opening salvo of “gymnastics is back” season (?)—at least for a couple months before “oh wait never mind no it’s not” season—Simone posted a video of herself doing a triple double beam dismount into a pit.

On the scale of realism, this is certainly in the “just crashing into the pit because gymnastics is supposed to be fun” category (Morgan Hurd countered with a similar double double of her own), but it’s also Simone, so who knows.

Because the double double was given just an H, Simone ditched it immediately after getting it named for herself at worlds because the potential for deductions essentially makes it not worth the single tenth gained over the full-in, a very comfortable skill for her. But if she flexed and went up to a triple double (which at this point would presumably be I-value—what we thought the double double would be), I’m saying I wouldn’t be mad about it.

“I will use this extra year to invent ONE HUNDRED new Bileseses.”

Meanwhile, we need a better system for awarding values of provisional skills. You shouldn’t have to wait until worlds to discover the official value of the thing you’re planning to do. You know we have the internet now, right?

B. Another one down

Seattle Pacific announced this week that the gymnastics program would be terminated immediately. Which, per my analysis, sucks and is also bad.

A DII team, SPU finished the 2020 “season” ranked 62nd nationally and made waves with the floor performance of senior Darian Burns, who scored as high as 9.925 for this excellence.

So while we thought that the advent of LIU’s program would get us back to 82 teams, it’s really going to be getting us back to 81. For now.

Speaking of LIU, your weekly update on who is joining the team for next season features Australia’s Talia Folino and Britain’s Izzy Hilliard (training video), the latest two to join the party. You’ll be more familiar with Folino, a member of Australia’s worlds team in 2017 and 2019, whose most impressive event is floor but has the elite-level skill set to be a critical four-event contributor. Folino would be a get for most programs, let alone a new one.

In other news, Kenadi Brown is transferring from Alaska to New Hampshire, Gracie Kramer will continue the UCLA-to-USU pipeline in becoming a volunteer assistant at Utah State, and the contact period has now begun for those athletes who would join NCAA programs for the 2022-2023 competitive season. LOL. Like any of us will still be alive in 2023.

C. Garbage fire updates

While USAG and the USOPC ooze their way through USAG’s bankruptcy proceedings largely unnoticed because it’s way too complicated and I, for one, definitely don’t understand a word of it, a judge did rule this week that the lawyers for the survivors can depose some USOPC officials—but have to choose only two in addition to the CFO.

I’d imagine Scott Blackmun will be one of the two lucky winners.

The survivors have also demanded that the justice department release the findings of its investigation into how badly the FBI swamp-farted its own investigation of That Guy. So basically we have to investigate the investigation of the investigation into Nassar. Everything’s going great. IT ALL WORKS FINE.

D. John Orozco

Our interview with John Orozco, in which be basically confirms everything you’ve ever suspected about the US men’s program but didn’t have any actual information to back up, is now available for all listeners.

2021 World Championships, Event Finals Day 2 GymCastic: The Gymnastics Podcast

Today, our immediate reactions after watching the final competition at the 50th Artistic Gymnastics World Championships including beam and women's floor; men's vault, p-bars and high bar: World and Olympic Rebeca Andrade (BRA) in the beam final Battle P-Bars and vault with 2019 floor world champion from the Philippines, Carlos Yulo, USA's Yul Moldauer and Hashimoto Daiki (JPN) and Kaya Kazuma (JPN) Japanese beam goddess, Ashikawa, Urara vs. world champion Pauline Schaefer-Betz (GER) and beam star Luo Rui (CHN) Floor leaders, American Leanne Wong, power house Euros Champion Anastasila Bachynska (UKR) and world champ Murakami Mai (JPN) will compete against Maria Ceplinschi (ROU) and all-around champion Angelina Melnikova (RUS) for the podium Bronze all-around medalist Kayla Dicello (USA) vs World All-Around Champion Angelina Melnikova (RUS)  on floor and beam King Kohei Uchimura (JPN) swings high bar in front of his hometown in what may be his last elite performance. American national champion, Brody Malone (USA) attempts to make the medal stand on high bar BONUS CONTENT: Behind The Scenes Behind The Scenes is a live Q&A podcast just for club gym nerd members! We’re providing daily coverage after each day of competition plus podium training days during the 2021 World Championships in Kitakyushu, Japan! It’s our appreciation love letter to club members for supporting the show. Here’s how to ask questions live. Behind the Scenes we talk about all the stuff you can't see on the screen! What the Japanese team did after the meet was over, how we got in trouble with our fellow quarantine-ers  at the hotel; the travel saga; the robot machine COVID tests we took to get home Please login to your Club Gym Nerd account to listen and/or watch this episode. Not a member? Join here. JOIN CLUB GYM NERD  Join Club Gym Nerd for access to Behind the Scenes episodes. Buy our awesome clothing and gifts here. We have masks too! RELATED EPISODES 2021 World Championships, Event Finals – Day 1 2021 World Championships, Men’s All Around Final 2021 World Championships, Women’s All Around Final 2021 World Championships, Qualification – Day 3 2021 World Championships, Qualification – Day 2 2021 World Championships, Women’s Qualification – Day 1 2021 World Championships, Podium Training – Day 3 2021 Worlds Championships in Kitakyushu – Podium Training, Day 2 2021 Worlds Championships in Kitakyushu – Podium Training, Day 1 2021 World Championships Preview RELATED LIVEBLOGS Live Blog: 2021 World Championships, Even Finals – Day 2 Live Blog: 2021 World Championships, Even Finals – Day 1 Live Blog: 2021 World Championships, Men’s All-Around Finals Live Blog: 2021 World Championships, Women’s All-Around Finals Live Blog: 2021 World Championships, Qualifications – Day 3 Live Blog: 2021 World Championships, Qualifications – Day 2 Live Blog: 2021 World Championships, Qualifications – Day 1 Live Blog: 2021 World Championships, Podium Training – Day 3 Live Blog: 2021 World Championships, Podium Training – Day 2 Live Blog: 2021 World Championships, Podium Training – Day 1  
  1. 2021 World Championships, Event Finals Day 2
  2. 2021 World Championships, Day 1 of Event Finals
  3. 2021 World Championships, Men's All Around Final
  4. 2021 World Championships, Women's All Around Final
  5. 2021 World Championships, Qualification Day 3

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