The Balance Beam Situation

Because gymnastics is a comedy, not a drama

Things Are Happening – July 15, 2020

A. Denmark Says BYEEEEEE

Newsflash: Copenhagen does not want your hideous mouth droplets infecting its city.

Citing monies as the primary reason, Denmark has withdrawn from hosting the 2021 World Championships, still scheduled for the fall of 2021—just a few months after the rescheduled Olympics.

At this point, the FIG still intends to keep on trucking with the event by finding a new host, and we can assume that a couple of the usual suspect cities would still be on that truck…your Bakus and your Dohas, the cities most familiar with throwing random money at hosting fan-free events. They’ve been preparing for this for years. I can’t imagine many other cities would be jumping at the chance of hosting a money pit that might not even happen, though.

But we can hope. I’m still excited by the prospect of a post-Olympic worlds where Teja Belak rolls up to become world champion on vault.

B. 30 for 30: Bela Sucks

The 30 for 30 podcast series about how much Bela sucks—or, I mean, the Karolyi system—is out now. It’s seven episodes, and I’m three episodes in so far. There’s some good stuff in here, especially at the beginning with Emilia Eberle and her teammates talking about being trained by Bela in Romania and calling him Dracula, and some juicy unpacking of all the lies Bela told about himself and his fake dockworker background.

You also…spend a lot of time in episode two hearing from Steve Nunno and Mary Lou and Mike Jacki that I didn’t want to spend, but overall I’m into it.

I tried to dredge up the screenshot of Dracula labeled “Karolyi” from the NBC documentary about Bela and Martha’s love story from 2016, but it was not my finest screenshot work. I wish that were stull available somewhere. We’ve come a long way since 2016 in terms of the content being produced about Bela.

C. Nellie Kim: Nellie Sucks

Nellie Kim opened her maw and said some awfuls again. They’re exactly the kind of awfuls you would expect her to say about Nassar survivors wanting money and attention, just in case you don’t want to take the time to have Nellie inflict herself on your life again, which I totally understand.

But the Nellie-est nugget of all:

While discussing why she would never want to open a gym in the US, she says it’s because of RETALIATION GONE MAD THESE DAYS: “We’ll retaliate against you for calling my daughter stupid and fat and making her stand in a corner ten years ago.”

Nellie Kim, proudly captaining Team Calling Your Daughter Stupid and Fat since 1976.

D. College Gymnastics – Does It Exist?

Stanford cut 11 sports, and in a surprise to all of us, gymnastics was not among them. This time. It’s a miracle.

Meanwhile, the Ivy League announced it has canceled all fall sports for 2020 and will have no sports contested until at least January 1. Gymnastics is a winter sport that wouldn’t begin competition until January anyway, but no word yet on what this means for practicing. (The Ivy gymnastics programs are Yale, Penn, Brown, and Cornell.)

Both of these announcements have a very “this is only the beginning” vibe.

Meanwhile, Mara Titarsolej (NED) and Allison Lapp (FRA) are heading to LIU, and in the never-ending saga of Addy Dejesus, she’s apparently going to Iowa State now?

E. Simone Things

Simone did a DLO to double tuck for you.

So that was nice of her.

F. GymCastic

This week, we discuss #GymnastAlliance and reactions to Athlete A, including the emerging narrative that Maggie Nichols should have been on the 2016 team.

Paris World Cup Review GymCastic: The Gymnastics Podcast

Meet News GymCastic's Paris correspondent Laura Cappelle is here to help us break down the major stories of last weekend's World Challenge Cup, including The ridiculousness of how hard it was to watch this competition in the year 2022 Jordan Chiles' top international floor score of the year, and how the crowd reacted Shilese Jones' wolf-themed floor adventures, the difference between her intended D score and actual D score, and the whole point of US women actually going to challenge cups What professional dance critic Dr. Capelle PhD thought about the floor choreography and what makes a compelling floor experience for the crowd Does the men's technical committee hate joy and its own sport? Yes. Yes it does. A full debrief on the Heath Thorpe (AUS) dance skill rejection. Marine Boyer's home gold beam medal—and renowned beam specialist Jade Carey The terror on men's vault: why was this allowed to happen and what can be done about it? The Rebeca Andrade/Shilese Jones showdown on bars, and what happened to Flavia and Melanie at this meet Ellie Black's new skill, and why it's a win for gymnastics integrity The dawn of the age of Irish gymnastics The US men medaling in all their finals JOIN CLUB GYM NERD Join Club Gym Nerd (or give it as a gift!) for access to weekly Behind the Scenes episodes. Buy our awesome clothing and gifts here. We have a Ukraine Fundraiser design, all proceeds go to the CARE Ukraine Crisis fund. RELATED EPISODES & RESOURCES Donate grips and tape for Ukrainian gymnasts Donate to family of NCAA coach in Ukraine To follow the effects of the Russian invasion to Ukraine at Gymnovosti Gymnastics History and Code of Points Archive from Uncle Tim What the F Is Artistry? World Challenge Cups Are So In Right Now The World Championship Field Is Set US Championship and Men's Euros Recap US Championships Preview and Women's Euros Recap European Championships 2022: Women's Event Finals European Championships 2022: Women's Team Final European Championships 2022: Senior Women's All-Around MORE WAYS TO LISTEN HERE
  1. Paris World Cup Review
  2. What the F Is Artistry
  3. 559 World Challenge Cups Are So In Right Now
  4. The World Championships Field Is Set
  5. Spencer's Beloved BlogCasts

It’s possible that a team selected with corrupt intent can also end up being a correct and logical team, but I think that’s too much nuance for people, so it gets boiled down to a misleading narrative about people getting snubbed.

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