2024 began with Denver being introduced as “the Denver Broncos”

So the season started great

Oh no wait

Meanwhile, Georgia and LSU said, “We’re staying healthy this time!”

And I challenge this 9.6 for Emily Shepard due to rogue foot sabotage

On behalf of my client, we submit The Gutsu Defense

Everyone spent months of preseason perfecting the new Megan Rapinoe finishing position rules

Then got into the meet and went

But Denver said, “When in doubt, count it out.”

And North Carolina said, “Instead of 1 person for 3 seconds, how about 3 people for 1 second.“

And Alabama said, “Thanks, I hate it.”

“No seriously I hate it. I’m switching to swimming.”

The Super 16 got Mean Girls as a title sponsor this year

It’s almost like they see some correlation between gymnerds and using Mean Girls quotes as a substitute for an actual personality

Anyway, I’m not like a regular coach, I’m a cool coach

On the call, Jess and DD 6% knew what was going on at any given time

And quickly had to call for reinforcements

Bringing in Jordan Chiles to gently Only Murders their dynamic

But then DD said that eMjae Frazier had an exotic look, so

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So eating popcorn will make Jordan not make the Olympics?? Have we not learned our lessons from our abusive/toxic eating disorder culture yet? Ugh